Bipolar Life Victoria

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Gaslighting

Michelle

Moderator
Staff member
Have you guys experienced gaslighting?

"gaslighting: to manipulate (someone) by psychological means into doubting their own sanity."

In 2018 I was just out of hospital and I clearly heard my husband say to the person he was speaking to on the phone (which turned out to be his new lover) that "My wife has a mental illness and I didn't sign up for that".

I asked him about it later and he swore he didn't say it. But I know he did and to this day he still won't admit it.
This makes me doubt my sanity which is harmful in any situation but even more harmful for vulnerable people with a mental illness. :angry2:
 

Wes

Moderator
Staff member
My last housemate has Aspergers, and would lie and deny constantly.
He would twist stories to the point where I couldn’t be sure if I was right.
Is is so destructive to your self esteem and mental health.
So glad he’s gone...
 

Michelle

Moderator
Staff member
I don't know if it's a good idea to have people with mental illness living together. I'm sure it has its benefits but I think mostly it has potential to damage. I think that's why my doctor is always urging me to socialise outside Depression or Bipolar groups. I think it's good to have friends in all circles. No one understands me quite like another person with bipolar though. It's hard.
 
I overheard my mother whinging about me to my dad three months ago. She was very hurtful and the statements caused me extreme grief. It has fractured our relationship and I don't know what to do. My sisters say I'm being stupid and apologize and my therapist said forget her. She is my support person. Just wish she would engage with me and treat me like my sisters. She doesn't understand me.
 

Michelle

Moderator
Staff member
I overheard my mother whinging about me to my dad three months ago. She was very hurtful and the statements caused me extreme grief. It has fractured our relationship and I don't know what to do. My sisters say I'm being stupid and apologize and my therapist said forget her. She is my support person. Just wish she would engage with me and treat me like my sisters. She doesn't understand me.
I'm sorry you are going through this. Even the people who love us have a hard time understanding this illness. I think they are mad at themselves but they don't understand why and so get mad at us instead.
 

Melissa

Member
I overheard my mother whinging about me to my dad three months ago. She was very hurtful and the statements caused me extreme grief. It has fractured our relationship and I don't know what to do. My sisters say I'm being stupid and apologize and my therapist said forget her. She is my support person. Just wish she would engage with me and treat me like my sisters. She doesn't understand me.
Hi Midnight Rose,
So are you out of touch/disconnected from your Mum right now? And are you saying that your Mum is your support person (and she still said these things)? If so, how difficult? And what does your therapist mean by "forget her"? Do they mean keep moving forward in life, and forget your Mum? If so, again, how difficult? Or was the therapist meaning something else?
 
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